picture by rim74
Man this was long.
Fresh from C89 TAMAONSEN‘s latest CD “LiFESICK“, 悩みの種 features again 雨天決行 and his delicious rap vocals.
Japanese is an amazing language per se, but when it comes to rap is even more amazing. I mean, it works so well with this type of music it’s almost unbelievable.
I must say, the sad part about translating a song like this one is that the rhymes and everything else kinda vanish away.
Between the myriads of touhou doujin circles, Tamaonsen is surely one of the most original out there.
About the lyrics. I think they’re about that kind of envy towards who has more, which than turns into a chance for thinking about the miserable human condition bound to money, objects, and dull self satisfaction. Or better, from Mokou’s point of view. Once you’re immortal you slowly realize that things that matters are bound to a limited life. And probably they don’t even matter that much.
Isn’t it? Probably. I must say it wasn’t really easy to translate this song, and wasn’t easy at all to convey the meaning of each stanza. Hope everything’s ok.
Long intro is long, and the song is even longer. Like, infinite. Let’s quit it and go straight to the lyrics, shall we?
TAMAONSEN – 悩みの種
誰かにとって 考えすら付かない到底
もう有って当たり前 それは何とも無い掛け替え
ある種生きてく上の活力 不安も消す 悦楽 満足
切って離せない闇に光 花見に月 柳に鬼
dareka ni totte kangae sura tsukanai toutei
mou atte atari mae sore wa nani to mo nai kakegae
aru shu ikiteku ue no katsuryoku fuan mo kesu etsuraku manzoku
kitte hanasenai yami ni hikari hanami ni tsuki yanagi ni oni
My thoughts won’t simply stick to someone else’s no matter how,
By now it’s there, I know, a replacement I can’t even believe in
More than the energy of going through that type of living, my anxiety vanishes in pleasure and satisfaction
I can’t let go of that light piercing the darkness it won’t let go, like a moon during hanami, or a demon under a willow
それは何気ない だけど味気ない だけど有り得ない だけど成し得ない
受け手の立場 見える角度からなぞると どちらの芝でも緑になる様
現象 視界は黄金 他人事から期待と憧れ
そこには無い代用品 野次馬大行進
sore wa nanigenai dakedo ajike nai dakedo arienai dakedo nashienai
ukete no tachiba mieru kakudo kara nazoru to dochira no shiba demo midori ni naru you
genshou shikai wa kogane taningoto kara kitai to agokare
soko ni wa nai daiyouhin yajiuma daikoushin
That’s something so casual, but it’s so vain, but it can’t be, but it can’t be done;
Tracing the angle the receiver can look at, each lawn seem to become greenish
Is it a phenomenom? His vision field becomes golden, and he’ll get expectation and admiration from everyone else
There’s nothing that can take their place, humans’ curiosity takes the lead
太陽が昇る頃に起きて 烏が鳴いた頃に振り返り
月が昇ると瞳を閉じて 明日に期待してを繰り返し
同じ景色の四季を眺めて 歩みを止めずに今を掴んだ
有り触れた毎日が今じゃ 全てが黒に染まった
taiyou ga noboru koro ni okite tori ga naita koro ni furikaeri
tsuki ga noboru to hitomi o tojite ashita ni kitaishite o kurikaeshi
onaji keshiki no shiki o nagamete ayumi o tomezu ni ima o tsukanda
arifureta mainichi ga ima ja subete ga kuro ni somatta
Raising up by the time the Sun rises, by the time the birds start singing, I turn back
As the moon rises, I close my eyes to repeat my expectations for tomorrow;
Gazing at the same unchanged scenery during the whole four seasons, grasping each day without stop walking
The common days are what I’m living by now, everything’s painted in black
誰にでもあって 好いて嫌って 勝手気ままに語り合って
存在価値を見出して 期待出来ない様な未来を抱いていた
誰かにはあって 自分には暗転 だってこの手にはもう無くて
どうする訳でもなく放置 流れる水を掴む様に
dare ni demo atte suite kiratte katte ki mama ni katariatte
sonzai kachi o midashite kitai dekinai you na mirai o daiteita
dare ka ni wa atte jibun ni wa anten datte kono te ni wa mou nakute
dou suru wake de mo naku houchi nagareru mizu o tsukamu you ni
Everyone has something that likes or hates, everyone talks to each other for the counterpart’s convenience,
But once they find out this life’s true value, they embrace a future where they can’t seem to hold expectations at all;
It happens to everyone, times where something takes a turn for the worse, but there’s nothing more in this hand of mine by now
I neglect I don’t even have a reason to do anything, it’s like I’m trying to seize the flowing water with my hands…
傷が唸ってる 悪化してるのにも まず気付かなくて
ただ只管にきつく成って 感染 またも築く難点
余りに近くて 感知は未確定 その両の眼で見たくても霞める
存在がでかくて その価値が解らずに勘違い
kizu ga unatteru akkashiteru no ni mo mazu kidzukanakute
tada hitasura ni kitsuku natte kansen mata mo kizuku nanten
amari ni chikakute kanchi wa mikakutei sono ryou no me de mitakute mo kasumeru
sonzai ga dekakute sono kachi ga wakarazu ni kanchigai
My wounds are growling, and even though they’re growing worse I couldn’t even notice them at first;
They’re just giving me a more severe infection, they’re bulding up my weakness again
It’s way too close, this unsettled perception, even if I look at it with both my eyes it’s too hazy
Its presence is enormous, there’s no doubt I couldn’t understand its value
あれ？自分って？ 何処で識別 動く屍 死んでる眼
情熱 思想 理念 忘れた感情 何度も偽装してる
会話にも単語に全自動で 相手に合わせて人間気取ってる
徒花 霧に泡沫 人知れずに直に腐るか
are? jibun tte? doko de shikibetsu ugoku shikabane shinderu me
jounetsu shisou rinen wasureta kanjou nando mo gisoushiteru
kaiwa ni mo tango ni zen jidou de aite ni awasete ningen kidotteru
adabana kiri ni utakata hitoshirezu ni jika ni kusaru ka
What again? Myself? What are you discriminating? My dead eyes? A walking corpse?
Passion, thoughts, ideals, feeling I’ve forgot, I’ve concealed all of this countless times;
Even when I talk to someone, my words come out in automatic so I can make the others feel like I’m a human
A flower which bears no fruit is transient inside the fog, would it just rot if no one would get to know about it?
痛み逝く様を ただ茫然と 眺めるだけ
光を失くし 空いた隙間 もう何回目の同じ昨日
見飽きた風景 間違い探し どうでも良いから嫌気も無い
あれからどれだけ経って 解らないけど 大きくなる竹林
itami iku you o tada bouzen to nagameru dake
hikari o nakushi suita sukima mou nankai me no onaji kinou
miakita fuukei machigai sagashi doudemo ii kara kenki mo nai
are kara dore dake tatte wakaranai kedo ookikunaru chikurin
As if dying in pain, I’m just gazing everything, dumbfounded
In this empty gap where the light is lost, countless same yesterdays are piling up
Searching for errors in this scenery I’m tired looking at… I’m not even disliking it because I don’t care anymore
How many time has passed since then? I have no idea, but this Bamboo Forest surely grew in size…
誰にでもあって 好いて嫌って 勝手気ままに語り合って
存在価値を見出して 期待出来ない様な未来を抱いていた
誰かにはあって 自分には暗転 だってこの手にはもう無くて
どうする訳でもなく放置 流れる水を掴む様に （ｘ２）
dare ni demo atte suite kiratte katteki mama ni katariatte
sonzai kachi o midashite kitai dekinai you na mirai o daiteita
dare ka ni wa atte jibun ni wa anten datte kono te ni ha mou nakute
dou suru wake demo naku houchi nagareru mizu o tsukamu you ni（ｘ２）
Everyone has something that likes or hates, everyone talks to each other for the counterpart’s convenience,
But once they find out this life’s true value, they embrace a future where they can’t seem to hold expectations at all;
It happens to everyone, times where something takes a turn for the worse, but there’s nothing more in this hand of mine by now
I neglect I don’t even have a reason to do anything, it’s like I’m trying to seize the flowing water with my hands…（ｘ２）
今更何をやったって 後悔後を絶たず 役も立たず
夢や期待や希望 費やす時間に負け無し びた一文
理解した上の渇望 それを理解した上の葛藤
絶えずに励ます嫌な奴がいて 今更生きたくなる奴がいる
imasara nani o yattatte koukaigo o tatazu yaku mo tatazu
yume ya kitai ya kibou tsuiyasu jikan ni makenashi bita ichimon
rikaishita ue no katsubou sore o rikaishita ue no kattou
taezu ni hagemasu iyana yatsu ga ite imasara ikitakunaru yatsu ga iru
What have you done now, after all this time? Not even trying to suppress your regrets? That’s useless, you know?
Dreams, hopes, expectations… Don’t lose to time wasting, you won’t obtain anything;
More than the longing I’ve come to realize, there’s the conflict I’ve come to realize:
There’ll always be those unwanted people that’ll cheer up for you, even now there are still those punks that want to be alive…
逆光 新たな影 眩しくても行ける貴方の御蔭
荒げる声 闇の向こうへ 切り裂く霊験あらたかな手
この竹は戒めの数と太陽が昇る東で伸ばす
あれ？自分って？ 羽ばたいた 精魂を背にし燃やした翼
gyakkou aratana kage mabushikute mo ikeru anata no okage
arageru koe yami no mukou e kirisaku reigen arata kana te
kono take wa imashime no kazu to taiyou ga noboru higashi de nobasu
are? jibun tte? habataita seikon o se ni shi moyashita tsubasa
A new shadow on the backlight; No matter how bright, thanks to you I can go further,
The raising voices towards the darkness, a overly miraculous hand cutting through it;
Those bamboos count each warning as the Sun raises its way towards the East
What? Me? My soul has took flight with my burning wings on my back
“Resurrection”
誰にでもあって 好いて嫌って 勝手気ままに語り合って
存在価値を見出して 期待出来ない様な未来を抱きたくない
確かにあって 自分にもあった 存在価値は今やもう無い
それでも生きていたいと思えるから 未だ燃える翼
dare ni demo atte suita kiratte katteki mama ni katariatte
sonzai kachi o midashite kitai dekinai you na mirai o dakitakunai
tashika ni atte jibun ni mo atta sonzai kachi wa ima ya mou nai
soredemo ikiteitai to omoeru kara imada moeru tsubasa
Everyone has something that likes or hates, everyone talks to each other for the counterpart’s convenience,
But once they find out this life’s true value, they don’t want embrace a future where they can’t seem to hold expectations at all;
I’m sure I had it, I had it too, the value for a life… I don’t have it anymore,
But still, even now I can still think “I want to live”, so I unleash my flaming wings
誰かにとって それが当たり前 生きてく上でその手には形を変えて希望
無いなら無いで 新たに何かを探さなきゃつまらない
誰かの為 自分の為 今日より明日 背筋伸ばす
生きたくなる様な明日の自分に 成る様に今日 背伸びをしよう
dareka ni totte sore ga atari mae ikiteku ue de sono te ni wa katachi o kaete kibou
nai nara nai de arata ni nanika o sagasanakya tsumaranai
dare ka no tame jibun no tame kyou yori asu sesuji nobasu
ikitaku naru you na asu no jibun ni naru you ni kyou senobi o shiyou
It goes without saying that everyone hopes to change their own life’s shape with their own hands
But if it can’t be done, it can’t be done, but having to search for something else is such a burden;
For someone’s sake, or for my own sake, I’ll outstretch my back more towards today rather than tomorrow
I’ll outstretch myself so the present will be a place for the future me holding the will to live.
～
Notes:
– Probably the title is read as “nayami no shu” rather than “nayami no tane”. That’s because when 種 (tane, seed) appears in the lyrics, it’s read as shu, which is its on’yomi. This also can alter its meanings. “tane” itself is “seed”, but “shu” has more the sense of the word “type”, “variety”. Since the singer says “shu”, I kept the on’yomi meaning. But in the title’s translation I prefered “seeds”, because it sounded better, at least to me.
– Being the song very long, I wrote（ｘ２）at the end of the stanza who’s repeated twice.
– 徒花 (adabana) means “a flower that bears no fruit”, and so it also mean “something flashy that actually has no value”.
～
• Title: 悩みの種 (nayami no tane / nayami no shu) (Seeds of Worry // Cause of Annoyance)
• Circle: 魂音泉 (TAMAONSEN)
• Album: LiFESICK
• Vocals: 雨天決行
• Lyrics: 雨天決行
• Arrangement: Coro
• Release Event: C89
• Source: 月まで届け、不死の煙 (Reach for the Moon ～ Immortal Smoke), Imperishable Night, Fujiwara no Mokou’s Theme
Foreground Noises 